“Just say yes dear whatever you want” is how a male friend remarked to me about what he learned he should say when his bride to be was deciding some piece of the wedding. I guess he felt as though whenever he gave his input it was never received very well and his fiance always seemed to want the opposite.

More often than not  I’ve heard that the groom likes to stay out of the planning process. Brides can be passionate about the way they think certain things need to be like the location of the wedding and the wedding colors.  This is because a lot of women have had this dream wedding in their head for years and don’t want anyone to take away some of the key elements in their “picture perfect wedding.” Maybe men choose to stay out of it because they don’t want to squelch our dreams. Maybe they choose to stay out of it because it really doesn’t matter to them what our wedding colors are. Maybe they just want us to be happy on the day that is traditionally known as ”our big day.”  

July 11, 2010 is the date for our big wedding event. We have been planning for about a year and so far I think Colby,my fiance,  has put  in a good amount of input into our wedding. I asked him how much ”say” he feels that he has given to the plans of our wedding and he responded  ”I don’t think I have put in a lot of input or a little but somewhere in the middle.” 

I think we both are more excited about the actual day and event then the process it takes to get there. I know that I have fully taken charge when it comes to finding venues and vendors. After I research and select a few places he has always been by my side to visit them and make the final decision. When he almost couldn’t meet with a DJ because of other plans he cancelled them because he felt it was important for him to be there.

I love and embrace it when he takes a particular interest in some part of the wedding. I want him to feel like this is our event and that pieces of it represent who he is too. So I was happy and agreed when he selected George Straits “Carried Away” as our first dance. I listened to the song and thought it was sweet. I was excited when he initiated planning the honeymoon. He wants to plan a surprise. Some people think I am crazy for relinquishing control over this but I think it is romantic.

I think that we have struck a fair balance in our decision making. He is with me every step of the way to make the major decisions pertaining to the wedding. If Colby was more aggressive and wanted to put alot more input into all the little things, I think we may start to butt heads. Like I said before I want him to feel like he is a part of this process but I am happy that he isn’t passionate about the way everything has to be like our wedding colors and favors. That’s my job.