My Happy Place

 Picking Myself Up Again

Ahhhh, if only we could instantly transport ourselves to some wonderful past experience or vacation the instant that we feel down. Take ourselves to that moment when we felt really good and confident about ourselves, when we felt truly happy. When I am feeling upset about some thing I am far away from that moment and struggle to even imagine being happy.  I do sometimes long for my bed in these moments and to be cuddled up hiding under the sheets.

When the dog bites, when the bee stings, when I’m feelin’ sad, I simply remember my favorite things, and then I don’t feel so bad . . .Julie Andrews had the right idea when singing “My Favorite Things” in the movie The Sound of Music. If we can remind ourselves of some things that make us happy it can instantly allevate our mood somewhat.  I don’t only think of  my favorite things when I am upset I talk to some of my favorite people; my fiance my family or a close friend.  It always seems to  feel somewhat better after I have unloaded the information to someone else. Then I like to process through why I am feeling the way that I do. What is triggering the emotion is there something that I am not aknowledging that is associated with why I am upset? If it relates to someone else can I put myself in the other persons shoes to understand why they may have done what they did to upset me? Then I often process and dissect these same things on my own until I have come to a conclusion that I can understand. If I feel like there are things that go beyond my relm of control then I often turn to prayer to help me feel better. At that point I feel as though it is in God’s hands anyway.

During this stage of processing there are two things that I try not to do. One is talk about a negative situation that happened over and over again with different people. This can make me feel worse and doesn’t seem to help at all. If anything I feel guilty for talking about it so much. The other thing I try to do is not let myself go down the “What if…” road. You know what I’m talking about because we all tend to do this. We think of all the dramatic and devasting things that could potentially happen but often do not. One of the biggest lessons I have learned is not to worry unil you have to worry. I cause myself more anxiousness thinking about things that I don’t need to because they will never happen. You don’t want to waste time worrying about something that doesn’t exist yet.

After all this thought I usually have a fresher perspective on things and feel a weight has been removed off my shoulders somewhat. I’m lucky to have wonderful people in my life that are excellent at helping me through this process.  A mixture of someone I trust and some insightful thoughts takes me to the place I need to be. 

The Bully

Being a teacher I feel like a protector to those that are in my classroom. The underdog story that I am drawn to exists on most playgrounds,  the story of the bully and the victim. We’ve seen these roles in movies like Lucas, The Ant Bully, and Mean Girls. For a long time we have accepted that these roles exist in life but things have gotten more serious. These roles can’t be ignored now with news stories like Columbine and the suicides of young children that feel like they are the victims of bullying.

The school I work in takes a no tolerance to bullying stance and follows through on it. If a child is caught bullying another more than once  they must meet with the principal and counselor to create a letter of apology and reflect on their actions. This letter goes home and a copy of the apology is given to the victim. This apology can be like gold to the child that is a victim. I like this process because it causes the child to think about their actions and admit that they are wrong. That is often what is missing when bullying occurs; owning up to their behaviors, aknowledging that the behavior is wrong and how it hurts the other person.

I care about each and every one of my students and I want them to feel safe in my classroom. I want to make sure that my students realize that it is not okay to make others feel isolated, ganged up on, and hurt. I am passionate about helping any victims and having the bully understand the results of their actions. I want everyone to feel happy in my classroom. You can bet when a bullying situation comes up I won’t ignore it. I would never want to hear about my students having to go through the sadness that other schools have experienced like Columbine.